I miss Savta

Ra'anan's grandmother, Toby Schwarzmer (Savta is Hebrew for Grandma) was an incredible woman.  I was extremely close with her and would speak with her constantly.  I turned to her for advice, and always called whenever I had a  problem.  She could always help.  She loved hearing stories about Netanel, and I always called her as soon as he  did or said something cute.

Savta passed away over a year ago, yet I still feel her loss.  Hardly a week goes by without Netanel or Leah doing something cute, that makes me want to reach for the phone to call Savta.  Ra'anan and I will look at each other, and in unison say " I miss Savta"  Sometimes we don't even need to say it-we see it in each others eyes.

Savta is probably my closest loss since becoming an adult.  My mother, maternal grandmother, paternal grandfather and step-mother all passed away by the time I was 20.  Papa passed away while I was pregnant with Netanel and, although we spoke often, I never felt like I could confide in him. Zaidy (step-mom's father) died a few years ago, but unfortunately I had not seen him in over 10 years.
Savta, on the other hand, I met as an adult and only knew as an adult.  I shared everything with her: cute stories, my fears, my growth in Judaism- even my favorite series of books (which she loved as well).  Her loss ghaunts me to this day.

I just hope I can do  justice to her memory by raising my children to be proud, strong Jewish children, honest and kind and filled with stories of their Savta-Savta who loved -still loves- them very much.


RMS